The Beginning

My name is Marci. When I was two months out of high school, I met my future husband, Chris. Approximately 10 months after we met, Chris and I were married. And yes, I was 19 when we got married.

Some people consider 19 years of age to be "too young" for a girl (or anyone, really) to get married. People may say, "You haven't had time to experience the world, yet. You don't want to wind up with those kind of regrets." Others may say, "People aren't mature enough at age 19 to get married. That's why most young marriages end in divorce soon after the nuptials."

If someone had said either of those things to me prior to getting married, it wouldn't have changed my mind. In response to my "not having experience of the world," I would have said, "Now I can experience the world with my husband, who is my best friend, instead of alone."  For me, marriage is part of world experience and I am so glad that Chris and I decided to go through it together.

I realize that 19 does seem to be a young age to get married, especially in this world where people like to have their careers in place before venturing into the married world. However, I think that  people confuse age and maturity to be synonymous. I believe that age and maturity generally correlate with each other, but just because someone is young, that doesn't mean that he or she cannot also be more mature for their age.

Chris and I have been happily married for about 5 1/2 years, now. Have our lives been perfect? No. Do we fight? Yes, sometimes we do, but the important part is that we let go of our pride and apologize to each other (regardless of who is -supposedly- at fault).

Marriage is absolutely wonderful! You get to go through the rest of your life with someone by your side, no matter what. Sadly, because each person has agency to choose and make decisions about their own lives, some people decide that the "no matter what" part isn't worth the time and effort anymore. Let me repeat that. Yes, I said that marriage is work and it takes both time and effort from both people to make it last. I think that someone misinterpreted some fairy tales and decided that once you get married, everything was supposed to be smooth sailing after that ("happily ever after"). However, I think they forgot to consider how much work it takes to make a marriage work. Personally, I LOVE fairy tales, but I don't think that they meant that the simple act of getting married was supposed to create the "happily ever after." I think life would be boring after getting married if it was all smooth sailing and "perfection" after that. Life is not meant to be perfect. I like to think of life as a great experience where we go through difficult times in order to grow and learn.

My point is that, for all intents and purposes, my marriage to Chris, wasn't a "happily ever after." My marriage was only the beginning of our story together.